Showing posts with label beliefs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label beliefs. Show all posts
Monday, 19 March 2018
Wednesday, 31 January 2018
Thursday, 18 January 2018
Can Self Esteem Be Taught?
Of course it can, in fact we have all, as a society been
taught to believe self esteem is even a thing. Prior to 1980 most people hadn't
even heard of self esteem. The first use of the term can be traced back to 1890
but even then the concept of self esteem didn't really even become an accepted
as a psychological concept until the late 1960's. This came about as the rise
in consumerism and consumption started to put the individual at the centre of
his or her destiny.
A major influence on the self esteem movement was Nathaniel
Brandon who is often credited as the father of the self esteem movement. So if
you're having self esteem issues as you might like to call them, you can blame
him. This was affected by enlightened self interest and radical individualism
espoused by An Rand. Whilst Branden's views may not be what they once were, he
is widely credited with opening the door of self esteem to popular culture.
This occurred sometime around the late 80's as self esteem began to move from
the world of academia into the public consciousness.
Helped along by political types, a member of the California
State Assembly even claiming low self esteem is the cause of drug abuse,
teenage pregnancy and even school underachievement. Seeing boosting self esteem
as a form of social vaccine. All this despite no evidence and many studies
showing evidence to the contrary.
Unlike many fads that come and go, self esteem has hung in
there and become part of the social fabric and popular culture of the western
world. These unsubstantiated and erroneous beliefs about self esteem became
part of the teachings about how we should view ourselves. So effectively much
of our society has been taught to believe in self esteem. It has become reality
based on collective belief and wish instead of evidence or fact.
What can you do? Refuse to rate the self, start by accepting
yourself because you can breathe, and start to notice when you are trying to
rate your entirety. When things go well try being happy stop yourself at that
point if your habit is to start making sweeping generalisations about yourself
as a result. When things don't go well its OK to be unhappy, but rating
yourself because of it is not only unhelpful, it's also incredibly inaccurate.
Learning to accept yourself unconditionally is the best place to be.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9837151
Friday, 15 December 2017
Do You Believe Persistence Creates Success?
For centuries, people have chanted that the most persistent
person wins the prize. In this article, I am going to challenge that belief. I
assert that it is not persistence that makes the difference. It is the
stripping away of beliefs that allows an individual to keep going. While I
understand that people in the stands watching a sporting event have opinions
about successful athletes. On the field, there is something happening that the
fans cannot see. The same applies when people view what they call persistence.
To start, the human brain stores everything it hears, smells
and sees in neuropaths. Those neuropaths possess your attitudes and belief
systems. When you were born, you were told you could be anything you wanted.
However, when you said you wanted to be CEO of a Fortune 500, you may have been
told about being realistic. If you were black or Hispanic, you may have been
warned that being CEO of a Fortune 500 is so rare for blacks and Hispanics that
it's best to focus on being a doctor or lawyer. Many women may have been told
the same. In addition, you were told that women and minorities have to work
twice as hard as white males, especially if those males came from affluent families.
This kind of conversation creates cognitive dissonance. That
refers to a situation involving conflicting attitudes, beliefs or behaviors.
This produces a feeling of discomfort leading to an alteration in one of the
attitudes, beliefs or behaviors to reduce the discomfort and restore balance.
In other words, being told you can be anything you want, but CEO is
unrealistic, creates internal conflict and tension. One path is to stay in the
conflict and pursue your dreams. The other is to avoid the conflict and take
your parents' advice.
While the cognitive dissonance may have initially started
with your parent(s), you inherit the same conflicting thoughts your parents
have. Since you trust your parents, you trust they know what they are talking
about, even if you believe you can be the exception. (Depending on
socioeconomic class, being a doctor or lawyer may appear to be unrealistic.
Therefore, the child is told to focus on getting a lower paying job with
benefits, for example. By the way, many children are discouraged when they want
to be professional athletes.)
To go against your parents is to simultaneously go against
conversations stored in your neuropaths. As you can see, this creates a
quandary for the individual. As a result, a woman or minority could sabotage a
great career because they spent time looking for evidence to prove they can't
be CEO of a Fortune 500. They would seek evidence they have to work twice as
hard. Even those two beliefs work against one another. Why?
While the job of CEO is extremely demanding, he or she must
be able to delegate. If a woman or minority believes working twice as hard is
what got them to the position of CEO, they may believe that is what they have
to do to remain in that position. Eventually that person will become
overwhelmed because they did not delegate effectively. An overwhelmed CEO could
result in a poor performing company and eventually lose their job. There is a
saying that the best CEOs work on their companies, not in them.
Furthermore, you may be so exhausted from working twice as
hard that you may become disheartened to pursue a higher level of management.
So working twice as hard can be a double-edged sword.
What does this have to do with persistence? If a woman or
minority was told that being a CEO was unrealistic, they will have mental
barriers that stop them from pursuing CEO. While those conversations may be
stored in your brain, upon introspection, you will see those thoughts and
beliefs are not your own. They are the beliefs of your parents, teachers,
media, etc. Therefore, you are not obligated to adhere to them. As you strip
away the inherited beliefs of others, you can make a clear path for new
thoughts and beliefs. This time they will be the thoughts you choose for your
life.
On the other hand, if you never inherited conflicting
beliefs, you would have a clear mindset. That mindset would allow you to move
through each phase of success in your life with power and alacrity. To the
observer, you would look persistent. Contrary to the observer, you would have
the advantages of seeing no barriers. The same possibility occurs for the
person who strips away inherited barriers. With built in barriers, you spend
time being in conflict with them or stripping them away. If you don't know how
to strip them away, you are stuck. Without the barriers, you have freedom and
open fields to do what ever you want.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9834829
